Bubbles

Image: Reini68

As I walk into the living room to check on the munchkin, I spy what looks suspiciously like spilled liquid on the sofa cushion. “Ah, munchkin? What’s this? Did you spill your water or something?” I ask calmly.

“Nope,” he says, eyes averted.

Okay…now I know something’s going on. “Okay…did your juice box spill, then?”

“Nope,” he says, eyes flick to me and then away again.

Right. Okay, time for a stronger approach. “Look, honey. I can see something spilled on the couch, I just need to know what it is so I can figure out how to clean it up. So…what is it? Water? Juice box? What?”

“Nothing, okay! Nothing,” he says frantically.

“I’m not going to be upset, hon–”

“Yes you will!” he interrupts. “You’ll be mad at me!”

Okay, now I know something’s going on. Accidents happen. Nothing to flip out over – especially something as simple as spilled food or drink. Come on. Get real. But he’s worried that I’ll be mad. Why?

“I promise I won’t be mad, honey. Please just tell me so I can clean it up,” I plead, again, calmly.

“BUBBLES!” he shouts, the word practically bursting from his mouth.

I stare, dumbfounded. “What? Um, bubbles?”

He nods, eyes downcast. “I took the bubbles out, and I knew I wasn’t supposed to. But I did it anyway. And they spilled. *Long pause.* I’m sorry.”

Lesson Learned

Aha. Well, connection made. He was upset because he knew he’d done something he was specifically told not to do – no opening/playing with the gigantic jar of bubbles in the house because the opening for the liquid is too big. Case in point.

Lesson learned.

“Oh. Um, I think some of it might have gotten on the pillows, too,” he says, smiling shyly and picking up two of the throw pillows that clearly show a lovely splash pattern on them. “I’ll help you, Mommy.”

Crazy munchkin.

The bubbles are gone, the couch is clean, and all is right in munchkinland again. Thank goodness.

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Losing control | Daily inspiration

Image by: winterdove

I was just having a conversation yesterday about how challenging it is not to have control over things that hurt our loved ones. It’s one thing to manage the issues in our own lives, but what happens when something disappoints, causes anxiety or hurts – whether physically, emotionally or spiritually – our child, our spouse, our parent, our friend?

What then?

One-year track reading: Genesis 36-38

Focused reading: Genesis 34:1-31

This is exactly what happened to Dinah, her brothers and her father. She was taken advantage of by Shechem, the son of a local ruler. Because she was defiled, she would never be able to marry, according to Hebraic law of the time.

But there’s more to the story.

Dinah’s victimization not only caused her pain and suffering, but spurred her brothers to take violent action against Shechem and all his men.

See, sin affects everyone – not just the person who’s been hurt or who’s sinned. In this case, Shechem paid a big price: his life. And, because of his sin, all of his men also lost their lives. Because Dinah’s brothers felt they needed to avenge her defilement, they acted violently, killing men.

No one wins where sin is concerned.

Heal, Restore & Thrive

So how do we heal from pain, from hurt, from sin? How do we take back the control we feel we’ve lost? We turn to God.

God can work through any situation. He cannot change the past, but he can work through your present to help you cope, change, grow and ultimately thrive. God was victorious over sin at the cross. No matter what happened to you, God knows. Turn to him for comfort. Turn to him with your pain. Ask him to heal your hurting heart and restore you. He is the only one who can restore your soul.

~Women’s Devotional Bible, Zondervan

Today’s Reflection

1. Describe a time when someone hurt you, either physically, emotionally or spiritually.
2. How did it impact not just you, but those around you?
3. What are God’s promises to you that he will forgive you and restore you? Write an exchange prayer, trading in your feelings of pain, sorrow or loss for the victory of being a believer (e.g., “I trade in my loss of innocence for the truth that I can regain purity through Christ’s blood.”).

Related readings: Genesis 49:1, 5-7; Psalm 147:3-6; Isaiah 43:18-19; Romans 12:19-21

Next one-year reading: Genesis 39-41

The next time you feel like you’re losing control when it comes to your own life or the life of a loved one, turn to God. Ask him for guidance, for support, for healing.

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No excuses. It’s time. (Day 26 Dare)

It’s time for forgiveness. It’s time to admit fault. It’s time to admit wrong-doing. No, I’m not talking about what others have done to us. I’m talking about what we have done to others – particularly our spouses.

Today’s K-LOVE Love Dare Day 26 challenge talks about taking responsibility for our actions.

We are so quick to justify our motives. So quick to deflect criticism. So quick to find fault – especially with our spouse, who is always the easiest one to blame.

We tend to believe that our views are correct, or at least much more correct than our mate’s. And we don’t believe that anybody, given our same set of circumstances, would act much differently than we have. As far as we’re concerned, we’re doing the best we can. And our spouse just ought to be glad we’re as good to them as we are.

Sound familiar? I know it does to me. So, what should we be doing instead?

Love doesn’t make excuses. Love keeps working to make a difference – in you and in your marriage.

Hmmm…so, how should we respond?

The next time you’re in an argument with your spouse, instead of working up your comebacks, stop and see if there’s something worth listening to in what your mate is saying. What might happen in your relationship if instead of passing blame, you first admitted your own wrongs?

Today’s dare: Take time to pray through your areas of wrongdoing. As for God’s forgiveness, then humble yourself enough to admit them to your spouse. Do it sincerely and truthfully. Ask your spouse for forgiveness as well. No matter how they respond, make sure you cover your responsibility in love. Even if they respond with criticism, accept it by receiving it as counsel.

This could take awhile for me. How about you? I’d love to hear how the Love Dare challenge is going for you. Leave me a comment to let me know.

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Forgive + Forget = Freedom (Day 25 Dare)

Are there people in your past or present whom you feel wronged you? When you think about them, are you happy? Sad? Angry? Livid?

Today’s K-LOVE Love Dare Day 25 challenge tells us to free ourselves from this type of prison. How do we do that? By forgiving these people – and ourselves.

It cannot just be considered and contemplated but must be deliberately put into practice. Forgiveness has to happen, or a successful marriage won’t.

K-LOVE says this is the hardest challenge we’ll face in this Love Dare. Now, I don’t know about you, but for me, this isn’t too much of a challenge. Do I get upset when someone wrongs me? Of course. Do I rant about it for awhile? Often. Does it irritate me and frustrate me? Sure.

But, do I hold a personal grudge against that person? Do I feel my blood boil when I think about them and what they’ve done to me? No. Usually, I just feel sad and sorry for them that they felt the need to act that way. How about you? How do you react when someone wrongs you?

The Love Dare talks about the inability to forgive as a prison.

As you look around, you see a number of cells visible from where you’re standing. You see people from your past incarcerated there – people who wounded you as a child. You see people you once called friends but who wronged you at some point in life. You might see one or both of your parents there, perhaps a brother or sister or some other family member. Even your spouse is locked in nearby, trapped with all the others in this jail of your own making.

This prison, you see, is a room in your own heart. This dark, drafty, depressing chamber exists inside you every day. But not far away, Jesus is standing there, extending to you a key that will release every inmate.

No. You don’t want any part of it. These people have hurt you too badly. They knew what they were doing and yet they did it anyway – even your spouse, the one you should have been able to count on most of all. So you resist and turn away. You’re unwilling to stay here any longer – seeing Jesus, seeing the key in His hand, knowing what He’s asking you to do. It’s just too much.

But in trying to escape, you make a startling discovery. There is no way out. You’re trapped inside with all other captives. Your unforgiveness, anger, and bitterness have made a prisoner of you as well.  …you have chosen not to forgive… Your freedom is now dependent on your forgiveness.

Can you do it? Can you release the weight you’ve been carrying around?

We see all kinds of dangers and risks involved in forgiving others… But forgiveness doesn’t absolve anyone of blame. It doesn’t clear their record with God. It just clears you of having to worry about how to punish them. When you forgive another person, you’re not turning them loose. You’re just turning them over to God, who can be counted on to deal with them His way.

It’s about freedom. It’s about letting go.

So, how do you know if you’ve really forgiven them?

You know it when the thought of their name or the sight of their face – rather than causing your blood to boil – causes you to feel sorry for them instead, to pity them, to genuinely hope they get this turned around.

Today’s dare: Whatever you haven’t forgiven in your mate, forgive it today. Let it go. Just as we ask Jesus to ‘forgive us our debts’ each day, we must ask Him to help us ‘forgive our debtors’ each day as well. Unforgiveness has been keeping you and your spouse in prison too long. Say from your heart, ‘I choose to forgive.’

Whom will you forgive today? Sometimes it starts with forgiving yourself. Just remember: God will deal with the unjust so you don’t have to. Let me know how it goes.

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